Tuesday, October 5, 2010

Weigh In and October Goals. Outstanding October Goals, that is...

Let’s start over. Hi…I’m Kyoko. I’m trying to lose weight and blog about it but I keep hitting roadblocks. I’m the one putting them up, I think, but that doesn’t make them any easier to pass.

I had to delete all the old blogs of yours that I hadn’t read yet. My google reader was over 1000. I’m sorry, actually really sorry if I missed anything important that went on with you. The good news though is now I can start over, actually comment and not get overwhelmed. I miss this weird and wonderful blogging world and I have to find my way back.  However this is a good time if I don't subscribe to your blog to let me know so I can start!

For the past month or so, I have been feeling like self awareness should go a long way towards solving my problems. Maybe that’s silly but I feel like I should be able to say “I am aware that X will sabotage me” and then it won’t happen. However I’ve been saying “I am aware that X will sabotage me, so I’m gonna go ahead and X anyway but expect different results.”

We all know how well that works. Just one chocolate, one quick drink, it’s a special occasion, I’m on vacation, everyone TOLD me I just had to have a turkey leg at Disneyland…and the tiramisu comes in a Mickey mug…

But it is out of control. I still can’t find my happy medium. I need to find ways to treat myself and not starve, but still not go overboard. It didn’t work to have small treats here and there, I thought it worked to have my indulgence filled week but it didn’t. There are too many opportunities for delicious dinners, for fancy chocolates. Friends, I bought not one but two salted caramels from a chocolate place on Saturday, put them in my bag, went to eat lunch but didn’t finish and instead of eating those caramels I split a cupcake with my mom. A salted caramel cupcake (I’m obsessed, it’s the best flavor combo since…ever).

I have a new mantra. Don’t even remember what my last one was. But the new one is this – I have all the tools. I have all of the tools. I have the Legos, I have the freaking lego table. I have the knowledge of how to build my tower…and there are days that I feel like I have a Lego construction set that will auto-build my tower for me. So what I thought is this – if my tower isn’t getting taller there are zero excuses. None. Look at you guys, at your support, at your stories, look at HusbandCake and his amazing dedication to my weight loss. I have everything. If anyone out there can lose weight – then I can too.

I have all the tools. I’m going to start building right now.

And now…my sad little weigh in!
Previous weight (2 weeks ago): 186.8
Yesterday’s weight: 186.8
Pounds lost: 0.0

Well there you have it. I consider it a half-win though because I was up…and came back down over the weekend. Now, time to change it up so that next week you see a much happier number coming from me!!

Finally, I’m not going to touch on my September goals. I didn’t meet most of them and we’ll leave it at that. It was an overwhelming month, and I’m a bit ready to move past it and have an amazing October.

With that I present…my October goals!
1. Work out four days every week – even if it’s just 20 minutes.

2. Finish cleaning out my garage – we had gotten so far…but haven’t worked on it in about a month! I really want it to be an organized usable space instead of a big pile of mess.

3. Make good and conscious food choices – I’ve seen that it’s not realistic for me to skip meals out completely, but that doesn’t mean I need to be getting anything fried or covered in sugary sauce. I can’t let a few meals ruin a completely healthy month!

4. Go Candyland crazy – Halloween is a Candyland theme this year and I need to make the best Princess Lolly costume of all time, not to mention helping Erin deck out her yard as a Candyland board. It’s not actually going to be super easy but it will be totally worth it!

5. Do nice things. Really nice things – above and beyond nice things – at least…8 of them.

6. Post my Bodybugg calorie counts – the less I post, the less I post those, and the sadder those numbers make me.  Of course I didn't post today, well...that's because I am having trouble with my computer at the moment but I'll be in touch with IT today and get it for you tomorrow :)

7. Get below 180 pounds – I am not about to beat myself up if it doesn’t happen but I would really, really like it to be this month!

8. Blog – blog blog blog. Every day. ok not every day. Most days!


Brigitte said...

I am glad you are feeling better! More importantly, I am glad you are back to the blogger world! It is so hard to get behind in blogs. Let's rock October!!

Rachel said...

I have learned the more I blog the better handle I have on things. I have been enjoying your blog and look forward to watching your October rock. The CandyLand thing sounds AMAZING! Hope you will be posting pics.

KyokoCake said...

@Brig - I am glad too! I'm already feeling...better :)

@Rachel - there will be oh so many pictures!! I agree too about blogging, it helps you reflect on each day and stay away from downward spirals and the like!

Katie J said...

That board sure sounds like fun!

Glad you are back and that your numbers did not go UP!

Look forward to more posts from you in October :-D

Raegun said...

Welcome back - we've missed you! Those look like some fantastic October goals. Bring it ON!!!!

Ice Queen said...

There you are! And, I am glad that you didn't gain. Holding steady is not a bad thing, girl. :D

Your goal list looks very doable. And I think that you can absolutely get below 180 by the end of the month. No, actually, I believe that you can. *nods head vigorously*

Tammy said...

We have a doughnut shop here called Frost that makes one mean Salted Caramel Old Fashioned. I try to stay away from that place. Glad to see you back. Here's to a great October!


Sara the FtGrl said...

Good for you for clearing the Google Reader - I have just over 100 and I'm thinking I need to do the same thing. In a way it's kinda encouraging knowing that all the people I follow updated while I was off on my own little pity party!

Goals - something else I should do. Sounds amazing.

GB Girl said...

Found you while blog hopping this morning...love your theme!

Sometimes you have to celebrate the zeros. No loss, but no gain either. The most important thing in this whole journey is your mindset. Sounds like you are addressing that the right way. Congrats on that!

Looking forward to hearing about your progress.

Salted caramel cupcakes...I'm intrigued.

KyokoCake said...

@Katie J - thank you my dear!! I am glad too :)

@Rae - I'm just hoping to keep up with them, it's tough climbing back on this wagon!!!

@Ice Queen - thank you friend and thanks for your confidence! I am glad about not gaining too, although I was really up and down for a minute there. Vacations leave me with zero food control!

@Tammy - I don't know if I could stay away. I saw after I posted this yesterday that Starbucks Salted Caramel hot cocoa is back...I almost cried, I do not need that delicious temptation!

@Sara the FtGrl - It's almost demoralizing to see such a high number of unread blogs, makes you feel kinda like a friend not keeping up with correspondence! But this time I'm hoping I'm committed enough to stick with reading (and writing!). As for goals - I DEFINITELY recommend them. They keep me on track day to day about way more than just weight issues!

@GB Girl - thanks new friend! :) I think I am ready to be back on track for more than just a few days this time :) and as for that salted caramel cupcake, it was...amazing. All salty sweet and perfect. But I am SO GLAD that if I want another one I'd have to drive up north for an hour!

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